Oh, my badly-neglected blog. I'm so sorry I've been ignoring you! This blog is where I first started "sharing" my writing. It began as a way to get my writing out into the world and to search for an audience - and to get feedback. I love blogging. I haven't had much time for it lately though. In the past three years I've had two children, two books published, we sold our home and moved into a new one, and then there's also my "day-job" with the school district that I've worked in between babies! Life has been busy. I'm not complaining - I've been loving every minute of it, but I have been struggling to find time to write. Which leads me to my first announcement...
BOOK THREE in THE LOST MAGIC SERIES will be released by Central Avenue Publishing sometime in late 2012/early 2013!! It depends on a few variables and I will share the exact release date with you as soon as it's decided upon. But the third book is in the works! Title and synopsis will be announced soon - look for it in the Central Avenue summer catalogue (available July 1, 2012).
And my second announcement, that I'm quite excited about :) I've decided to restart my blog and to run a short series of "features" to connect with and support other artists, writers, musicians, etc. in my community. I'm lucky enough to know quite a few talented individuals and to live in a supportive and close-knit community. I thought running these features would be a neat way to show people what I'm into, the unique businesses in my community and the creative and talented people I know. So stay tuned...
Suzi
Showing posts with label mother. Show all posts
Showing posts with label mother. Show all posts
May 18, 2012
Sep 7, 2010
Sometimes I Wonder About Myself
Did my mother make as many mistakes as I did and do? Do my friends? Do people just not want to talk about the stupid and embarrassing things they have done? I guess we’re all afraid of looking dumb or irresponsible but we all make mistakes sometimes, don’t we?
Over the past year and a bit, I have come to realize that parenting, like so many other things, is a trial and error process that you won’t necessarily get right the first time. I’m starting to wonder now about the “eldest children” out there that I know, aka. the parenting guinea pigs. Forget 'middle-child syndrome'!
But seriously, I think I am doing a pretty good job raising my Little Man but like I said, it’s harder than it looks. And though I’d like to blame lack of sleep and changing hormones and all those fabulous excuses, my child sleeps through the night and is nearly 1 ½ so I’ve got nothing. Guess I’ll just have to admit that sometimes, I’m just not that perfect - sometimes.
Here are just some of the things that make me question my ability to ‘parent’:
I have literally spoken the phrase: “No, this is Mummy’s chocolate and I don’t have to share.” I have also tried to sneak chocolate past the Little Man . You don’t even have to say it – I know.
Similarly, I have seriously considered raising my child to believe that he is allergic to chocolate. I’d love to say this would be for his benefit but really…
When I have run out of things to entertain my son (if we’re stuck waiting somewhere) I have let him play with such non-Daddy-approved “toys” from my purse as lip gloss, tampons and make up.
Instead of nursery rhymes, since my son was a newborn I have been singing songs like “All the Single Babies” (Beyonce), “Shake, Shake, Shake – Don’t Shake the Baby” (Shake Your Booty) and “Push it” (Salt n’ Peppa – usually when he’s pooping).
I laugh when my son farts. I know this only encourages him but he looks so surprised and then cheeky… how do you not laugh?
Whenever the Little Man sees an empty beer can he runs to pick it up. He will either pretend to drink from it and then go “ahhhh” or he will take it straight to his Daddy. We have no idea where he picked up these habits.
I may have once forgotten to properly close the backdoor to my car after buckling my son in. I was pulling out of my spot in the Walmart parking lot and the door flew open – the Little Man laughed and started waving at the shocked people he could now clearly see. I stopped and closed the door. It may have actually happened twice.
Whenever the Little Man hears a loud truck, he points and yells, “Daddy!” When we’re in a parking lot, I find myself repeating over and over, “No, that’s not your Daddy. No, he’s not your Daddy either. Nope, not baby’s Daddy, try again.” I love it when the guys driving the big trucks have their windows down though and hear him. That “deer-in-headlights” look is priceless. It’s even funnier if there’s a girl sitting next to them. The Little Man will usually smile and wave like he really does recognize them too.
It’s bad enough that the Little Man already recognizes a Tim Horton’s (the source of the occasional cookie ) and claps his hands and points from the backseat of a car going 90 km/hr, but it’s even worse that the girls in the Tim Horton’s drive thru by my house know not just me but also my son by name!
I bought the Little Man his own little baseball bat. I don’t know what I was thinking with that one. Our cat still hasn’t forgiven me.
And finally, I’m wondering whether I really should be saying things to my son like:
- “No, we don’t hit Daddy. Only Mummy can do that.”
- “Get the cat!”
(He runs after it screaming. It’s pretty funny until he does it to other people’s cats.)
- Daddy – “What does Mummy say?”, Little Man – “Mooo!”
(My husband thought that was a pretty clever thing to teach him.)
- “Ouch! Mother Ducker!”
(If he repeats that one at daycare, I think I’m still going to look pretty bad.)
- “Look – there goes Big Fat Baby!”
(Baby who lives down the street whose name I always forget. This has the potential to be quite embarrassing once the Little Man can talk more.)
- “Pick it up quickly, it’s still good. Five second rule… Ten second rule… Thirty second rule… Here, let me get that for you.”
- “Baby, be careful! Don’t go near the Evil Bunny!”
(My sister-in-law bought me this as a joke. I suppose I shouldn’t perpetuate the idea that the bunny is “evil”. I’ll include a picture so then you’ll have a better idea of what I’m talking about. Actually, in this case, it might be an example of good parenting – you decide!)
Suzi
Over the past year and a bit, I have come to realize that parenting, like so many other things, is a trial and error process that you won’t necessarily get right the first time. I’m starting to wonder now about the “eldest children” out there that I know, aka. the parenting guinea pigs. Forget 'middle-child syndrome'!
But seriously, I think I am doing a pretty good job raising my Little Man but like I said, it’s harder than it looks. And though I’d like to blame lack of sleep and changing hormones and all those fabulous excuses, my child sleeps through the night and is nearly 1 ½ so I’ve got nothing. Guess I’ll just have to admit that sometimes, I’m just not that perfect - sometimes.
Here are just some of the things that make me question my ability to ‘parent’:
I have literally spoken the phrase: “No, this is Mummy’s chocolate and I don’t have to share.” I have also tried to sneak chocolate past the Little Man . You don’t even have to say it – I know.
Similarly, I have seriously considered raising my child to believe that he is allergic to chocolate. I’d love to say this would be for his benefit but really…
When I have run out of things to entertain my son (if we’re stuck waiting somewhere) I have let him play with such non-Daddy-approved “toys” from my purse as lip gloss, tampons and make up.
Instead of nursery rhymes, since my son was a newborn I have been singing songs like “All the Single Babies” (Beyonce), “Shake, Shake, Shake – Don’t Shake the Baby” (Shake Your Booty) and “Push it” (Salt n’ Peppa – usually when he’s pooping).
I laugh when my son farts. I know this only encourages him but he looks so surprised and then cheeky… how do you not laugh?
Whenever the Little Man sees an empty beer can he runs to pick it up. He will either pretend to drink from it and then go “ahhhh” or he will take it straight to his Daddy. We have no idea where he picked up these habits.
I may have once forgotten to properly close the backdoor to my car after buckling my son in. I was pulling out of my spot in the Walmart parking lot and the door flew open – the Little Man laughed and started waving at the shocked people he could now clearly see. I stopped and closed the door. It may have actually happened twice.
Whenever the Little Man hears a loud truck, he points and yells, “Daddy!” When we’re in a parking lot, I find myself repeating over and over, “No, that’s not your Daddy. No, he’s not your Daddy either. Nope, not baby’s Daddy, try again.” I love it when the guys driving the big trucks have their windows down though and hear him. That “deer-in-headlights” look is priceless. It’s even funnier if there’s a girl sitting next to them. The Little Man will usually smile and wave like he really does recognize them too.
It’s bad enough that the Little Man already recognizes a Tim Horton’s (the source of the occasional cookie ) and claps his hands and points from the backseat of a car going 90 km/hr, but it’s even worse that the girls in the Tim Horton’s drive thru by my house know not just me but also my son by name!
I bought the Little Man his own little baseball bat. I don’t know what I was thinking with that one. Our cat still hasn’t forgiven me.
And finally, I’m wondering whether I really should be saying things to my son like:
- “No, we don’t hit Daddy. Only Mummy can do that.”
- “Get the cat!”
(He runs after it screaming. It’s pretty funny until he does it to other people’s cats.)
- Daddy – “What does Mummy say?”, Little Man – “Mooo!”
(My husband thought that was a pretty clever thing to teach him.)
- “Ouch! Mother Ducker!”
(If he repeats that one at daycare, I think I’m still going to look pretty bad.)
- “Look – there goes Big Fat Baby!”
(Baby who lives down the street whose name I always forget. This has the potential to be quite embarrassing once the Little Man can talk more.)
- “Pick it up quickly, it’s still good. Five second rule… Ten second rule… Thirty second rule… Here, let me get that for you.”
- “Baby, be careful! Don’t go near the Evil Bunny!”
(My sister-in-law bought me this as a joke. I suppose I shouldn’t perpetuate the idea that the bunny is “evil”. I’ll include a picture so then you’ll have a better idea of what I’m talking about. Actually, in this case, it might be an example of good parenting – you decide!)
Suzi
Jul 21, 2010
Bitchin' Post
Bitchin. This term is used as either positive adjective or negative verb, generally speaking. The noun bitch used to be a negative word too but I’ve noticed lately that it’s gaining a more positive context. Which makes me wonder, when did it become cool to be a bitch? I’m all for strong, positive female role models but the lines between “strong” and “bitch” are at times becoming blurred. I’ve been thinking about this a lot lately. It comes up when I’m writing fiction for teens and I want to develop characters that are positive, believable role-models. Also, when I think about my own life and how much unexpected satisfaction I’ve found in becoming a stay-at-home mother and wife, it makes me reconsider my previous notions of success and who positive female role-models are.
We often admire the women who have the most power, but why? Especially if that power has been gained through manipulation, deception and undermining the abilities of others – what’s admirable about that? Don’t praise someone for being rude and nice-it-up by saying they are just “honest” or “straight-forward” or “they tell it how it is”. Here’s straight-forward for you: Bitches are mean. Speak your mind and express how you feel but don’t do it at the expense of others’ feelings. There’s nothing wrong with being considerate of others. Can’t women who are passive, non-confrontational, considerate or kind be considered ‘strong’ role-models too?
I think positive female role-models are the ones who carefully choose their battles. I think they are the intelligent, self-aware, caring women who will bite their tongues when necessary and “rip you a new one” when appropriate. I think they are the teachers, the scientists, the artists, the business women, the laborers AND the wives and mothers of our world.
Try to imagine a movie that tells the story of a young woman who is intelligent, kind and though not overly popular, she is well-liked (now ask yourself why this character sounds so mediocre?). She decides that though she is perfectly capable of becoming a Doctor or Laywer or scientist, she’d rather spend her time focusing on her relationships with her family and friends, and so she bypasses University to become a young stay-at-home wife and mother. GASP. Are you horrified??? Why does it sound so scandalous? I even feel a little… wrong suggesting that this might be a positive female role-model for our youth. But why? Why can’t we admire the women who are confident enough to make the right choice for themselves, even if it’s not the choice that modern society suggests they should make?
Why does someone need a list of achievements and possessions to be admired? Who wrote this checklist that we work from? Why aren’t the accomplishments of wife, mother and friend enough? Why should I care how much education you have? Or where you work? Or how much you get paid? Or what kind of car you drive?
And why should I admire you when your honesty is hurtful? Or when you’re so concerned with proving you don’t need anyone else’s approval that you lose the respect and admiration of those closest to you? Why should I admire your strength when you’re overly aggressive and unnecessarily confrontational?
Call me a bitch, but I won’t.
Suzi
We often admire the women who have the most power, but why? Especially if that power has been gained through manipulation, deception and undermining the abilities of others – what’s admirable about that? Don’t praise someone for being rude and nice-it-up by saying they are just “honest” or “straight-forward” or “they tell it how it is”. Here’s straight-forward for you: Bitches are mean. Speak your mind and express how you feel but don’t do it at the expense of others’ feelings. There’s nothing wrong with being considerate of others. Can’t women who are passive, non-confrontational, considerate or kind be considered ‘strong’ role-models too?
I think positive female role-models are the ones who carefully choose their battles. I think they are the intelligent, self-aware, caring women who will bite their tongues when necessary and “rip you a new one” when appropriate. I think they are the teachers, the scientists, the artists, the business women, the laborers AND the wives and mothers of our world.
Try to imagine a movie that tells the story of a young woman who is intelligent, kind and though not overly popular, she is well-liked (now ask yourself why this character sounds so mediocre?). She decides that though she is perfectly capable of becoming a Doctor or Laywer or scientist, she’d rather spend her time focusing on her relationships with her family and friends, and so she bypasses University to become a young stay-at-home wife and mother. GASP. Are you horrified??? Why does it sound so scandalous? I even feel a little… wrong suggesting that this might be a positive female role-model for our youth. But why? Why can’t we admire the women who are confident enough to make the right choice for themselves, even if it’s not the choice that modern society suggests they should make?
Why does someone need a list of achievements and possessions to be admired? Who wrote this checklist that we work from? Why aren’t the accomplishments of wife, mother and friend enough? Why should I care how much education you have? Or where you work? Or how much you get paid? Or what kind of car you drive?
And why should I admire you when your honesty is hurtful? Or when you’re so concerned with proving you don’t need anyone else’s approval that you lose the respect and admiration of those closest to you? Why should I admire your strength when you’re overly aggressive and unnecessarily confrontational?
Call me a bitch, but I won’t.
Suzi
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